Somedays...

Monday. Ugh, just the sound of it makes me sad. Today wasn't so horrible. The kids at the shetler had the day off from school so guess who got to work at 8 AM instead of Noon? Since I basically work at a daycare (no thats not my "title" and really there is more to it than that, but on days like today no one can argue with me, its a daycare), I have to follow the school schedule. So when the kids are at school I work 12-8 so I can be there when they get home and when they are not in school I am there from 8-4. I like 8-4 better for the most part (like being able to cook dinner and see Marc) but I like being able to sleep in on my 12-8 days and only seeing the kids for a few hours instead of 8.

However, today was fun. We had a wonderful organization donate tennis rackets and I have been slowly but surely teaching these inner city kids the sport of tennis. Most of them have no idea how to play and think the rackets are better used as pretend swords, but we are working on it. So today we "played" some tennis (with balls that weren't actually tennis balls on an outdoor basketball court... but hey, we do what we can). We had our Bible study, ate lunch (well they ate, I supervised), watched Chronicles of Narnia, and had coloring contests (with Veggie Tales on in the background).

There is one thing I do miss about the summer and the 8-4 workdays, the Bible studies with the kids. I miss hearing them pray and their thoughts on the story or verse of the day. It is always so refreshing. However, since during the school year most of our time is spent together after school, all of my energy is dedicated to homework and making sure they don't kill each other. But today we got a chance to have a  Bible study and a popcorn prayer. If you ever need to be blessed listen to a child pray, they are so sincere and loving and honest... everything Christianity should be. They pray for things like: mean people to have a good day, and moms to find a job, and that somehow, someway God will make a way for them to leave the shelter and live a better life. My heart breaks a little each time I hear them pray. I can't even begin to explain how much I want these children to succeed. They have faced so much in their short little lives, and it is just not fair. They are the products of a broken society, of lifetimes of bad decisions and of tragedies and struggle. I can see the attitudes and actions (good and bad) of their parents in almost every single one of them... I feel like they are bound to a cycle that has been placed on repeat. Some days it is literally almost too much, I want to be more to them than a daycare provider, and in someways I know I am.  I hate the feeling that for some of them it is too late, but some days I feel hopeless. Some days all there is to do is pray, so thats what we did today. One of the little girls started the prayer and to my amazement, they all sat still, taking turns praying for things that were on their mind. Some days make the other days so worth it.